DEATH BE NOT PROUD!
The ghouls at Amish Tech Support continue their loathsome tradition of the death pool. Being the merrily morbid sort, I joined in. Here are my fifteen choices and the reasoning behind them.
- Yassir Arafat: The Chairman of the Board among those I hope and expect who will soon be stiff as a board. What can I say about the man? Well, plenty, but mom may be reading. At 74 his body is as rotten as his soul and no matter how many baby wipes the man has, being cornered like the rat he is, thanks to the Tzahal, is quite stressful
- King Fahd bin Abdul Aziz of Saudi Arabia: Vegetables spoil eventually. Robert Baer has a creepy description of how far gone that potentate is. Not that it matters much to the kleptocrats of the House of Sod. His brain can be tapioca, so long as his heart beats.
- Ronald Reagan: Much the same theory as Fahd of Sod. Apparently the end is nigh for the Great Communicator. The difference is that I will mourn Ronnie's passing.
- Glen Campbell: He's 67 years old and still living hard. His liver can't last much longer.
- Jay Zeamer: This is one of those, "I hate myself for choosing him. I hope that I am wrong!" types of picks. As Richard Burton said in The Longest Day, "The thing that's always worried me about being one of the few is the way we keep on getting fewer." The 85 year old Major Zeamer is the last surviving Army Air Corps Medal of Honor recipient.
- Slingin' Sammy Baugh: Arguably the
greatest player in the history of the NFL. Like Zeamer, he is the last survivor of his elite class- NFL Hall of Fame charter enshrinees. Though still spry, he is 89 years old and all those tackles do add up after a while.
- Mike Wallace, : (The fossil journalist not the NASCAR driver).
To give you an idea how old Wallace is, he pitched cancer sticks on the idiot box. He was already an established journalist when he went over to TV... in 1951!
- Fay Wray: That delicate satin draped frame.
- George Habash: So much for the "I'd rather you not die, but you're no spring chickens and I want someone the other ghouls probably haven't picked" choices. Habash, another doddering terrorist, is in my "DIE YOU FILTHY BASTARD, DIE! " catergory. At 78, he may be a bit young to be a great pick, but Palestinian terror leaders tend to have a short life span. And I doubt Yassir would appreciate any competition, especially from a Christian born wannabe, even if he is allegedly retired.
I'm claiming Habash as my commie, BTW. Anyone names his murderous terror troupe 'Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine,' is redder than steak tartare.
- Bob Dole: Decorum forbids Viagra quips.
- Francis Crick: Yep. Trying to get the Nobel laureate. However it's Watson whose death seems to be awaited eagerly.
- Ray Bradbury: Please let me be wrong about this one. But he's another legend who has been around forever and the final curtain is very likely to end his long run sooner than I'd want.
- Alistair Cooke: Cooke is best known in the UK as their quasi-anthropologist among the colonials. The USAians remember him as the classy Brit who hosted Masterpiece Theater for two decades.
- Joey Bishop: The last of the last. The least flamboyant Rat Packer is the last one standing!
- Max Schmeling: The Black Uhlan of the Rhine not only outlived most of his opponents, he probably outlived his sport.
